Hospitality, love of good, self control

Text Titus 1:8a Time 19/05/10 Place Childs Hill Baptist Church
Last week we began to look at Titus 1:6-9. Titus you remember has been left in Crete to “straighten out” certain things, as Paul puts it following the planting of churches on the island. Especially, there was a need to appoint elders in every town, as Paul had previously directed. This leads Paul to list the qualifications of elders in verses 6-9. It is one of two such lists in the New Testament. The other is in 1 Timothy 3. The list in Titus is really in three or four parts.
First Paul says that (6) An elder must be blameless and a good family man. He must be the husband of but one wife, a man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient.
Then he repeats (7) that Since an overseer is entrusted with God's work, he must be blameless – and gives some five negatives and six positives. He must not be overbearing, quick-tempered, given to drunkenness, violent or one who pursues dishonest gain. Rather (8) he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined.
Finally, he says (9) that He must hold firmly to the trustworthy message as it has been taught, the reason being so that he can encourage others by sound doctrine and refute those who oppose it.
As we said last time when we come to this passage in the Bible there are two obvious ways to use it.
1 Paul is talking about elders and so if you are an elder or would like to be one then here is the standard. It's quite forbidding in some ways but Paul is really not setting the bar at an impossible height given the grace of God. Elders like me should regularly be looking at such a passage – as painful as it is. Those of us who are not elders can also use it to pray for present elders – that they will be as described here and for future elders - that they will attain to what is set down here.
2 As we've said, Paul does not set the bar remarkably high and surely we can all use this verse to examine ourselves, elders or not. Am I in my family setting all I ought to be? Am I seeking to be blameless – not overbearing, quick-tempered, given to drunkenness, violent or one who pursues dishonest gain? Am I seeking to be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined? And may be there are other applications too.

Last week we looked at verses 6 and 7 and we asked two questions
1 What is the situation at home? There are two things. The elder must be
The husband of but one wife. This is against polygamy not being single or a widow or even divorced necessarily. It suggests a strong marriage and precludes an immoral man.
A man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient. Paul goes further and says that the way a man conducts himself in his home is another clue to whether he is suitable as an elder in the church. Again, the point is not that he must have children but that if he does they must not be obvious rebels who break out in obvious ways.
2 How are you doing in these five areas? An elder is not only like a father over his family but also like a steward or manger over a household. Paul gives five negatives. These point first to something of what the work of an elder involves or of anyone who engages in Christian ministry then negatively the way of holiness for all believers. So we said
1 Consider the matter of authority and the danger of abusing it
Not overbearing – not self-willed, not self-pleasing or arrogant.
2 Consider the matter of frustration and the need to take care over it
Paul goes on not quick-tempered. An elder must not be the sort of person who easily gets angry.
3 Consider the matter of socialising and some of the dangers it can cause
Next we have not given to drunkenness. Later on Paul talks about the importance of being hospitable. That is a part of being an elder. One of the dangers that can bring is the temptation to over indulgence.
4 Consider the matter of opposition and the danger of reacting in the wrong way
The call to not to be violent or not to be a striker may seem a little obvious. Why is it there? Perhaps because of the opposition that inevitably comes to most elders. Violence and intimidation are out of court for any who engage in Christian ministry.
5 Consider the matter of rewards and some of the dangers it can cause.
The call to avoid pursuing dishonest gain.
This week then I want us to come on to verse 8 and I want to ask a further question.
How are you doing these areas?
In contrast to the five negatives Paul lists some six positives. We will consider three tonight.

1. What about hospitality?
Rather he must be hospitable. Hospitality is something that is spoken of very positively throughout the Bible and is something that all Christians are expected to give themselves too, not just elders. Now when we talk about hospitality we tend to think of “inviting someone to your house for a meal”. We also usually mean someone you know and who will probably invite you back. But that is not what the Bible means. The word used here is literally one that refers to love to strangers. It is translated more literally in Hebrews 13:2 Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it.
Presumably Paul mentions hospitality here because of the situation at the particular time.
Firstly, there was no modern welfare state in Crete as we have it today. Widows and orphans and other vulnerable members of society were dependent on what charity they could find. Elders, like all believers, should be willing to do what they can to help people in such circumstances.
Then there was also fierce persecution from time time and many believers had to flee from their home towns. Once they reached places of safety they were very much in need of help and sustenance.
Besides, these there were, of course, servants of God – Apostles, evangelists, prophets – who stood in need of financial and other practical help.
Now the situation has changed very much by our day and no doubt it will change again as the years go by. Nevertheless, the principle is clear – the elder must love strangers. Indeed, all Christians should love strangers. As we have said it is a biblical principle. Think of the examples of
Abraham (Genesis 18) receiving and entertaining angels.
The widow at Zarephath who looked after Elijah (1 Kings 17)
Obadiah who hid the hundred prophets in Elijah's day (1 Kings 18)
The Shunammite who urged Elisha to stay for a meal and went on to provide a room for him (2 Kings 4)
Job (29:16; 31:32) I was a father to the needy; I took up the case of the stranger. ... no stranger had to spend the night in the street, for my door was always open to the traveller -
Onesiphorus 2 Timothy 1:16 May the Lord show mercy to the household of Onesiphorus, because he often refreshed me and was not ashamed of my chains.
Lydia Acts 16:15 When she and the members of her household were baptised, she invited us to her home. "If you consider me a believer in the Lord," she said, "come and stay at my house." And she persuaded us.
Ananias and Sapphira Acts 18:26 He began to speak boldly in the synagogue. When Priscilla and Aquila heard him, they invited him to their home and explained to him the way of God more adequately.
See also these Scriptures:
Exodus 22:21, 23:9 Do not mistreat an alien or oppress him, for you were aliens in Egypt. ... Do not oppress an alien; you yourselves know how it feels to be aliens, because you were aliens in Egypt.
Leviticus 19:33, 34, 24:22 When an alien lives with you in your land, do not mistreat him. The alien living with you must be treated as one of your native-born. Love him as yourself, for you were aliens in Egypt. I am the LORD your God. ... You are to have the same law for the alien and the native-born. I am the LORD your God.
Remember Luke 14:12-14 Then Jesus said to his host, When you give a luncheon or dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers or relatives, or your rich neighbours; if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid. But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.
Matthew 25:34-40 Then the King will say to those on his right, Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me. Then the righteous will answer him, Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you? The King will reply, I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.
Romans 12:13 Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality.
1 Peter 4:4 Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling
We need to have the right attitude. We need to be open and ready to speak to strangers, ready to help them if we can. We are not all outgoing by nature but we can all love strangers. We can show hospitality to one another too. Obviously, we have plenty of opportunities to be welcoming to strangers who come into our meetings. We can be friendly and kind in other situations too. Don't forget persecuted believers. What can we do to help them?
2. What about loving what is good?
one who loves what is good
This is very generalised. The actual word Paul uses is only found here but the idea is everywhere in the Bible.
In 1:16 Paul says of false teachers that They claim to know God, but by their actions they deny him. They are detestable, disobedient and unfit for doing anything good.
How did they get into that state? No doubt it bean with a lack of love for what is good. Such an attitude inevitable leads to a love for what is evil. In the end such a person becomes incapable of doing good.
How about you? Do you love what is good? Not – do you try to do ...? But Do you love it? Do you delight in what is right and holy? Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things (Philippians 4:8).
In 2:7 Paul says to Titus In everything set them an example by doing what is good. Such a thing is impossible if you do not actually love what is good. If you don't love what is good you will become self-conscious and hypocritical just doing what is right to set a good example not because you are genuinely concerned about right and wrong.
Do you have a real heart for what is good? Pray to love the good.
See also 2:14, 3:1, 8, 14 eager to do ... ready to do ... Careful to devote themselves to doing ... must learn to devote themselves to doing ....
None of these things will happen if we do not first love what is good. What are you most eager to do? The things you love doing! People are rarely ready to do something they hate after all. You will certainly never devote yourself to something you hate. Here is the root of it then. Seek to cultivate a love for what is good – it will make you eager, ready and devoted to good.
Good things include Prayer, Bible, good deeds, holy living, kindness, witness, etc.
3. What about self-control?
who is self-controlled
The primary meaning of the word used here is to be sane or in one's right mind. It means to have your faculties under control. It then came to be used for being temperate, self-controlled, sober-minded, having control of one's desires and impulses. Sensible then in the ethical sense.
In Mark 5:15 the word is used and so we read about the demoniac being clothed and in his right mind. In 2 Corinthians 5:13 too Paul talks about being out of his mind and being in our right mind. Usually, however, this word and its related ones is translated self-controlled. Paul uses it quite few times just in this letter. See 2:2, (4) 5, 6, (11), 12. It is also in 1 Peter 4:7 The end of all things is near. Therefore be clear minded and self-controlled so that you can pray.
We must not give into our desires however legitimate they may be. Rather we must learn self-control. The people God uses are sober, serious, discreet people not those who are light or frivolous. That does not mean that we need to be solemn and boring but we do need to be sober and sensible. Our opinions and actions should be well balanced.
In one place the NIV uses propriety. See 1 Timothy 2:15 But women will be saved through childbearing - if they continue in faith, love and holiness with propriety. In Titus 2:4 we have Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children. 2 Timothy 1:7 has For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.
The people who God uses then, especially to lead his churches, are those who curb their passions, who know how to control themselves.
What is your self-control like? How much self-discipline is there in your life? There are obvious areas to think about – food, drink, sexual desire, anger, the tongue, TV, computer (internet), money, etc.

Home life and Christian service - a challenge

Text Titus 1:6, 7 Time 12/05/10 Place Childs Hill Baptist Church
We looked last time at Titus 1:5 and what Paul says there about leaving Titus in Crete, where churches had been planted but where certain unfinished things still needed to be “straightened out” as Paul puts it. Especially there was a need to appoint elders in every town, as Paul had previously directed Titus. That leads Paul then to list the qualifications of elders in verses 6-9. This is one of two such lists in the New Testament. There is a similar one in 1 Timothy 3. This list is really in three or four parts.
First Paul says that (6) An elder must be blameless and a good family man. He must be the husband of but one wife, a man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient. Then he repeats (7) that Since an overseer is entrusted with God's work, he must be blameless – and gives some five negatives and six positives. He must not be overbearing, quick-tempered, given to drunkenness, violent or one who pursues dishonest gain. Rather (8) he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined. Finally, he says (9) that He must hold firmly to the trustworthy message as it has been taught, the reason being so that he can encourage others by sound doctrine and refute those who oppose it.
When we come to this passage in the Bible there are to obvious way of using it.
1. Paul is talking about elders and so if you are an elder or would like to be an elder then here is the standard. It's quite forbidding in some ways but Paul is really not setting the bar at an impossible height given the grace of God. Elders like me should regularly be looking at such a passage – as painful as it is. Those of us who are not elders can also use it to pray for present elders – that they will be as described here and for future elders - that they will attain to what is set down here.
2. As we have said Paul does not set the bar remarkably high and surely we can all use this verse to examine ourselves, elders or not. Am I in my family setting all I ought to be? Am I seeking to be blameless – not overbearing, quick- tempered, given to drunkenness, violent or one who pursues dishonest gain. Am I seeking to be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined and may be there are other applications too.
So with these ways of application in mind let's look at these qualifications and consider ourselves in their light. We can ask four questions. We will just consider two of them this week.

1. What is the situation at home?
When Paul says (6) An elder must be blameless he is not suggesting that only perfect people can be elders. There would be no elders on that basis. When he says they should be unaccused or irreproachable he means that they should not be open to any obvious charge against them.
The fact that he begins with family life would suggest that Paul sees the church as an organisation to be run very much on family lines. I think that comes out elsewhere in the New Testament. Take 1 Timothy 5, which begins Do not rebuke an older man harshly, but exhort him as if he were your father. Treat younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity. We should remember that right at the very beginning the church, the state and the family were all one. That is how it will be at the end of time too. At the present the separation of family, church and state is important to maintain but we must not think that these three God ordained institutions are so very different in the way they operate.
So there are two things here. The elder must be
1. The husband of but one wife
There is no way that Paul is saying that widowers are excluded from office. It is unlikely that he is even saying that a person who has been divorced cannot be an elder. Rather, his point is a simpler one. No polygamist can hold church office. Perhaps our instinct confronted by polygamy would be to say a man must get rid of all his wives except the first one but the biblical pattern seems to be that the situation should continue but that such a man cannot hold office in the church. It also suggests surely a strong marriage and precludes an immoral man.
2. A man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient
Paul goes further and says that the way a man conducts himself in his home is another clue to whether he is suitable as an elder in the church. Again, the point surely cannot be that someone who has no children cannot be an elder. Paul is making a general point. What about this statement that his children must believe? This should probably be rendered a man whose children are faithful. It should be parallel to not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient. We cannot say that a man cannot be an elder if his children grow up to be unbelievers. As John Gill points out salvation is in God's hands not ours! Surely the point is that children of elders must not be obvious rebels who break out in obvious ways. I have heard of men whose children were in trouble with the police or something like that offering to resign. Although it is far from being straightforward in such a case I think that is the sort of area we are in.
Here is a reminder to us all then about family life – to be obedient and respectful children, to be faithful, submissive, co-operative and caring wives and mothers, to be faithful, loving, caring husbands and fathers.

2. How are you doing in these five areas?
In verse 7 there is the repetition - Since an overseer is entrusted with God's work, he must be blameless. This time, having stressed that the elder must be a good family man, Paul goes on to speak of the elder as one entrusted with God's work – a steward or manager, if you like, responsible for the fair distribution of God's grace. Remember Paul's words back in 1 Corinthians 4:1 So then, men ought to regard us as servants of Christ and as those entrusted with the secret things of God.
He gives five negatives. These point first of all to something of what the work of an elder involves or of anyone who engages in Christian ministry and then shows negatively the way of holiness for all believers. We can say then
1. Consider the matter of authority and the danger of abusing it
Paul says that the elder must not be overbearing – not self-willed, not self-pleasing or arrogant. One of the dangers of authority is that it can be abused. It is a danger that an elder or other holder of office can easily fall into. It must be avoided says Paul. A humble authority is the sort we are to look for.
2. Consider the matter of frustration and the need to take care over it
Paul goes on not quick-tempered. An elder must not be the sort of person who gets angry very quickly. Perhaps that is there because Paul knows how easy it is to get frustrated with things and with people in particular when they do not respond in the way that we want. Too often an elder can be so full of dreams that when they are not fulfilled – there are few conversions, little growth in grace, people let you down, he even feels that he is himself not what he should be – he is tempted to get angry with himself and with others. That is no good. Be warned against a short temper.
3. Consider the matter of socialising and some of the dangers it can cause
Next we have not given to drunkenness. Literally, it is "not a tippler", "not someone who stays near the wine". A man can get drunk alone, of course, but it is more likely to happen in company with others – especially in a Mediterranean culture. This is an obvious warning in some ways. Later on Paul talks about the importance of being hospitable. That is a part of being an elder. One of the dangers that can bring is the temptation to over indulgence. Drunkenness is the most obvious example of this sort of thing though one can think of other ways in which hospitality could be abused – endless time wasting over tea or coffee, for example. Paul expects elders to socialise, to be with people. The minister is not to be six days invisible and the seventh incomprehensible as the saying goes. As attractive as the ivory tower may seem he is not to stay there. He has to be involved with the people. That is true of all Christian service. Even seminary professors have to interact with their students and work with the churches. At the same time the danger of over-indulgence must be guarded against.
4. Consider the matter of opposition and the danger of reacting in the wrong way
The call to not to be violent or not to be a striker may seem a little obvious to some of you. Why is it there though? I think perhaps because of the opposition that inevitable comes to most elders. Even if he escapes opposition from within there will certainly be opposition from without. Now the way to react to that is never to engage in fisticuffs.
In August 1972 the Ugandan dictator Idi Amin apparently sent a famous telegram to the Tanzanian leader Julius Nyerere challenging him to a boxing match. That is not the way we expect national leaders to exercise diplomacy and it is certainly not the way that elders should approach difficult situations either. Of course, violence is not always of a physical sort. There are other ways of intimidating an opponent. Such an approach is out of court for any who engage in Christian ministry.
5. Consider the matter of rewards and some of the dangers it can cause
Finally, we will consider tonight not pursuing dishonest gain. Now for many elders even today such a statement may seem slightly strange in that they could make far more money if they were not ministers. It is clear from the New Testament, however, that the policy was to make sure that elders were well rewarded. That verse in 1 Timothy 5:17 The elders who direct the affairs of the church well are worthy of double honour, especially those whose work is preaching and teaching is speaking not just of respect and honour but of financial reward too. Such rewards do put the minister in a difficult position sometimes. Therefore he must be very careful to be scrupulously honest and not to take advantage of his position of trust.
You hear sometimes, for example, stories of men cultivating a relationship with a wealthy widow or someone similar apparently in order to help themselves. There are even cases of men becoming entirely corrupted by the lure of financial reward. We all must beware of pursuing dishonest gain. Remember how Bunyan describes Demas in his Pilgrims Progress

"Then I saw in my dream, that a little off the road, over against the silver-mine, stood Demas (gentleman-like) to call passengers to come and see; who said to Christian and his fellow, Ho! turn aside hither, and I will show you a thing.
Christian: What thing so deserving as to turn us out of the way to see it?
Demas: Here is a silver-mine, and some digging in it for treasure; if you will come, with a little pains you may richly provide for yourselves.
Hopeful: Then said Hopeful, let us go see.
Christian: Not I, said Christian: I have heard of this place before now, and how many there have been slain; and besides, that treasure is a snare to those that seek it, for it hindereth them in their pilgrimage.
Then Christian called to Demas, saying, Is not the place dangerous? Hath it not hindered many in their pilgrimage?
Demas: Not very dangerous, except to those that are careless; but withal he blushed as he spake.
Christian: Then said Christian to Hopeful, Let us not stir a step, but still keep on our way.
Hopeful: I will warrant you, when By-ends comes up, if he hath the same invitation as we, he will turn in thither to see.
Christian: No doubt thereof, for his principles lead him that way, and a hundred to one but he dies there.
Demas: Then Demas called again, saying, But will you not come over and see?
Christian: Then Christian roundly answered, saying, Demas, thou art an enemy to the right ways of the Lord of this way, and hast been already condemned for thine own turning aside, by one of his Majesty’s judges; and why seekest thou to bring us into the like condemnation? Besides, if we at all turn aside, our Lord the King will certainly hear thereof, and will there put us to shame, where we would stand with boldness before him.
Demas cried again, that he also was one of their fraternity; and that if they would tarry a little, he also himself would walk with them.
Christian: Then said Christian, What is thy name? Is it not the same by which I have called thee?
Demas: Yes, my name is Demas; I am the son of Abraham.
Christian: I know you; Gehazi was your great-grandfather, and Judas your father, and you have trod in their steps; it is but a devilish prank that thou usest: thy father was hanged for a traitor, and thou deservest no better reward. Assure thyself, that when we come to the King, we will tell him of this thy behaviour. Thus they went their way.
By this time By-ends and his companions were come again within sight, and they at the first beck went over to Demas. Now, whether they fell into the pit by looking over the brink thereof, or whether they went down to dig, or whether they were smothered in the bottom by the damps that commonly arise, of these things I am not certain; but this I observed, that they were never seen again in the way."