Close Covenant Communion

Text Song of Songs 5:2-8 Date 08/03/20 Place Childs Hill Baptist

We are looking at the Song of Solomon and we are learning about covenant love. We are learning, on the horizontal level, about marriage and the love between a man and his wife, and we are learning on the vertical level about God’s covenantal love towards his people.

Already we have looked at the courting couple described in the opening chapters and then the wedding procession and the wedding night. Today I want us to look at the beginning of the episode that starts in 5:2 and again I want us to learn from it, both on the horizontal and vertical levels – about human relationships and heavenly ones. I want us to look first at what happens in verses 2-8. We will go on to the description given in verses 10-16 and prompted by the question in verse 9 another time.

Close covenant communion – why it is so rare?

In verses 2-8 we have a description of a scene that we can probably imagine without too much difficulty. It is night. Here is the woman in bed. She is alone. She is half asleep, half awake. Her husband is not there. Then she hears him knocking at the front door and calling her to open up. He is out in the cold and damp night air and the quicker she can open up the better. But instead of going down to open the door to him she shouts down the stairs ‘I’ve gone to bed. I can’t come down and open the door for you. It’s too much bother.’ He then starts to try and open the door some other way. She hears him and decides eventually to go down. However, by the time she gets down to open the door to him, he has gone. He has given up trying to get in and gone off somewhere else. Now she is really unhappy. She starts calling after him and looking for him. She wanders away from the house out into the city. The night watchmen spot her and thinking she is up to no good manhandle her and pull off the cloak that she has thrown round her shoulders. In desperation, she cries out to the women of Jerusalem to tell her where she can find her lover.

It is similar in some ways then to what we read in Chapter 3, only this time the dream seems more real in some parts. Throughout the sequence the spotlight switches from the woman to the man alternately. It is a little like watching a tennis rally or an animated conversation between two people – back and for, back and for. The whole scene reminds us of the adage that true love never runs smoothly. This is true not only of courtship but also after a marriage has been consummated. Some Christians get themselves into a needless frustration and disappointment because they do not have a perfect marriage. This can be especially acute if the courtship has been relatively brief and easy.

You can imagine I’m sure. Here are a young Christian couple, Tim and Sarah. They met at a Christian conference, fell in love and were married within 12 months. It’s been a blissful courtship, hardly a cross word. Then they have their first major disagreement over something. They are shattered – not just because they’ve argued and perhaps said things they shouldn’t, but the illusion of a perfect marriage has well and truly been blown. Now a passage like this shows us that even an idealised marriage like this one is likely to face problems. It is not good when that happens, of course, but it is not the end of the marriage.

Similarly, for those who have come to trust in Christ there can be unrealistic expectations concerning the Christian life. Here is a young man, Daniel. He’s been converted a year and he’s read his Bible every day since. Then one busy day he is little under the weather and with one thing and another he doesn’t find the time to read Scripture and he falls asleep at the end of the day his Bible open but unread. The next morning he is shattered by his failure. Or take, Becky. She gave her heart to the Lord six months ago and every day since then she has found time to pray to the Lord but this week has been a difficult one for her and one day was so busy she never prayed at all really. You can imagine how she feels. Again this passage is here firstly to remind us that there are no perfect Christians. We all fail in many ways. It is how we cope with such failures that matters.

1. Our all too common state

In verse 2 the beloved speaks and she says I slept but my heart was awake. In other words she was half asleep, half awake. It is clearly night time, which is a potent picture of the nature of the life we lead here in earth. The pictures of day and night, light and darkness, are used in different ways in Scripture. In one sense becoming a Christian is seeing the light. It is passing from the ignorance and darkness of sin into the Kingdom of light. However, in many ways it is still night time while we are on earth – until Christ comes again and brings a new day. Because of this it is very easy for us to grow sleepy and not to be watchful. You remember how when Jesus when he wanted the disciples to pray with him in Gethsemane sadly found them sleeping.

Sadly, we have to say that most often Christians are found in a state of spiritual sleepiness. We are not sound asleep it may be true but we are not fully awake either. Our most common state is of appearing to be asleep although thankfully our hearts have been awakened and we are at least open to spiritual realities.

Is that your state today? Is that often your state? As we shall see, it is a dangerous state to be in.

There is an application here to Christian marriages too. Too often they are rather sleepy things. Things muddle on fairly well but there is a lack of pro-activity and sometimes when a strain comes something gives. Wives must take care not to grow cool towards their husbands or husbands to their wives. The fires of passion and commitment need to be tended to or they will go out.

2. A Lover’s plea

Next in verse 2 she says Listen! My lover is knocking: Open to me, my sister, my darling, my dove, my flawless one. My head is drenched with dew, my hair with the dampness of the night. She can hear his knock at the door of the house they share. He knocks and he calls. He wants her to open the door and for him to come in to her. He calls her by four different terms of affection - my sister, my darling, my dove, my flawless one. The word my is thus repeated, emphasising their unity. The terms themselves focus on their family nearness, his care for her, her purity and her dignity.

A Christian husband may not use these terms often (perhaps he should) but he should think of his wife in these terms.

Sister. In the New Testament married believers are spoken of as heirs together of the gift of life. The Christian wife is not some sort of inferior person who gets her religion via her husband. No, they are joint heirs, both are priests to God. Her calling may be to submit to him in the marriage bond but they stand before God equal – saved sinners both, brother and sister in the Lord. Your wife is your sister now and when she is no longer your wife in heaven, she will still be your sister.

Darling. Love must be there for any marriage to work, of course. It is the calling of the husband above all to love his wife. Whether he calls her darling or not he must show his wife that he loves her.

Dove. In the New Testament husbands are told not to be harsh with their wives. They must always be gentle. They should never shout. They should never be brusque or hard. Think of her as a pure, gentle white dove and treat her accordingly.

Flawless. Husbands must respect their wives. They must treat them with the utmost dignity and honour. When we speak to them or about them that is paramount.

Now the great model for all this is the Lord Jesus Christ. This is how he speaks of his people. He is our elder brother. He is full of love for his own. How gently he treats us and how pure he desires us to be. He justifies us from every sin by his death on the cross so that when he sees us he sees us as flawless.

No here is pictured for us this perfect loving one knocking at the door and calling to us. Inevitably we think of the words of Jesus Revelation 3:20 Here I am I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door I will come in and eat with him and he with me. Often used evangelistically, they speak first to sleepy Christians who are neglecting close covenant communion with the Saviour.

3. Our all too common response

So how does this woman respond to this wonderfully loving approach? She says (3) I have taken off my robe - must I put it on again? I have washed my feet - must I soil them again? I’m in bed now she says. I’m not getting up and getting dressed. I’m not walking across the dirty floor to open up for you. Now she is half asleep and we can forgive a lot when people are half asleep but nevertheless it does show a fearful disregard for this ardent and devoted lover. Instinctively, we feel she is in the wrong here. Why did she not wait up for him? She must have known he was coming. At the very least she could have arranged something with the key. Her attitude is clearly a wrong one.

It is a danger in marriage. Things will only work if there is give and take. Selfishness destroys the bliss of married life. If we think only of ourselves and our comfort then things cannot work. It is no good when one side is wooing and the other is baulking at it.

It typifies our attitude to Christ too often as well. The Lord comes near full for winning words and wooing actions but we do not want to know. How many times have we woken in the morning thinking we ought t begin with the Scriptures but we’ve been reluctant. How slow we are to pray. How unwilling to sit under the preaching of the Word sometimes. We get ourselves so comfortable in this world sometimes that we are unwilling to make the effort necessary to draw near to him.

Is that you at present? Christ is wooing you today - Here I am I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door I will come in and eat with him and he with me he says pen to me, my sister, my darling, my dove, my flawless one. But you cant make the effort. You’ve come her – that is good – but you’re not willing to go any further or make any more effort.

4. A Lover’s Insistence

Where they were used keys in those days tended to be much larger than those we have today. Often there was room enough for a hand in the keyhole. Often there was no key just a latch. Here she says (4) My lover thrust his hand through the latch-opening. As she looks towards the door she sees that he is trying to let himself in by putting his hand through the opening in an effort to unhitch the latch.

Sometimes in the marriage relationship it can be like that. One or other is trying to get in to the other’s life as it were, trying to find a way of reconnecting. It is frustrating. If the other would simply open the door a little entry would be easy but they refuse. They are all shut up to you. We must try and find ways in where we can. Sometimes there is a shared interest, although many husbands and wives differ in their tastes and hobbies. Where both are Christians there is always the gospel that unites, although there is room for disagreement in things there. A marriage is only going to work if when there are barriers between the two, a door in the way, both work at opening it.

Something similar can be said about the relationship between Christ and his people. Holman Hunt painted a famous picture of Jesus standing at the door and knocking. One version is down in St Paul’s. It is often noted that the latch of the door is on the inside. That is correct. Christ is sovereign and he is the one who opens the door of the heart in conversion. However, when he speaks to the believer, he calls on him to open the door. As here he will sometimes thrust his hand trough the latch-hole insistently but we note here that that does not gain him entry. Christ is insistent. He wants to come into your life. However, it is up to you to act upon his invitations.

5. The proper response

So having now been fully awoken, the woman begins to react as she should have from the beginning. Note the four stages.

1. My heart began to pound for him. Her heart was awake at the beginning of all this but now it was pounding. She could hear and feel it. Oh how she wanted to see her lover. Oh how she wanted to hold him. We must come to that stage as Christians. Too often we are slow and sluggish. Our hearts are not beating very fast. We need to stir ourselves up sometimes. This is the point of preaching – to stir us by placarding Christ before us.

2. (5) I arose to open for my lover. Then she did something about it at last. Again that is what we need to do. You want to pray? Then get out of bed and pray. You want to read his Word. Get up and read.

3. And my hands dripped with myrrh, my fingers with flowing myrrh, on the handles of the lock. Next she gets hold of the lock to open the door. There is myrrh everywhere. Where has it come from? May be from him – he had put his hand through the lock-hole. May be from her – perhaps she had dipped her hands in it as she went. It was a sign of welcome to him. She is certainly in a very different mood to that which she had showed when he had been knocking. Now she wants to do everything she can to open up and welcome him. That is how we should be at the first sign of his coming near.

4. (6) I opened for my lover. This is where the pounding heart, the getting up and the fiddling with the lock was all leading. She wanted to get that door open and see him. If only she had reacted like this sooner. This is how we should be I our relationships with our husbands or wives – more than ready to open up to them. Responsive to their first approach. Eager to remove any barrier whatsoever. This is how we ought t be as regards close covenant communion with Christ.

6. A Lover’s departure

And then the tragic anti-climax but my lover had left; he was gone. How often that is the experience on both the human and the spiritual level. A wife has waited and waited for her wild man to calm down, for her neglectful husband to pay her attention, for her roving man to settle down but it has never happened and a day has come when the man suddenly wants his wife’s company and he can’t have it. She may not have left him in fact but her time is taken up elsewhere and he misses out. Time and tide wait for no man and if we take our wives or husbands for granted and presume they will always be willing to fit in with us we may have a rude awakening one day.

Spiritually we must reckon with the possibility of spiritual desertion. A mistake we often make is that because God is eternal and can always be sought then we can leave such times to our convenience. Eg when I’m older, later today, another season. However, reality is not like that. The fact is that for various reasons there are seasons when God draws near and if we do not take full advantage of such seasons then and there then we will not have the opportunity again. We can see this I trust on the human level (eg children growing up). There is a mystery here but we must recognise it.

Rabbi Duncan the Scots Hebrew teacher once prayed all the way through the lecture period to the annoyance of some but, as he said, "having gotten in he was loath to leave". He was an ecccentric but there is a lesson there.

7. The inevitable response

Then we read what she did when she realised he had gone.

1. My heart sank at his departure. She was devastated. This what one would expect. This is how a person would be if their husband or wife left or even just went off and they did not know where. If we deliberately push people away the boot may soon be in the other foot. There can be nothing worse for the believer than a sense of spiritual desertion. We are experiencing it as a nation – it can come to churches and individuals too.

2. I looked for him but did not find him. I called him but he did not answer. How frustrating. Do you know anything of this? Why does it happen? Sometimes it is a mystery but at other times we can trace it back to our own sinful neglect. Seek to avoid such things. If you are there – persevere.

3. (7) The watchmen found me as they made their rounds in the city. They beat me, they bruised me; they took away my cloak, those watchmen of the walls! It is difficult top be sure how to take this. This woman under went pain and humiliation at the hands of those who were really there to protect her. It was a case, no doubt, of mistaken identity. Such suffering at the hands of friends can be the lot of those who search for Christ but do not find him. Ministers doing their duty terrify and hurt.

4. (8) Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you - if you find my lover, what will you tell him? Tell him I am faint with love. Finally, we note her plea. She is faint with love. Are you like that today? Faint with love. Then we will pray for you. We will tell the Saviour.